Day 3

Hello, it is me again. Guess what... I am still sitting in the bedroom. What a surprise.

I am suppose to go to the psychologist every Thursday. I don't want to any more. I never did. The only reason why I went is because he told me that I should go. His family is also concerned about my mental stability. (Interestingly, my parents are totally oblivious to it)

Reason 1: Anti- Social
The first reason why he wants me to go is because he is concerned about my anti- social behavior. I don't have friends.

I admit, I often prefer sitting in the room alone and do art projects then to talk to people. Yes, I would choose arts and crafts over most people. Maybe the reason is because I dislike people. The human kind has disappointed me in so many ways, and so many times that I would prefer the company of my dead dog than most people. The reason why I have given up on people is because I have been back stabbed, lied to.. etc.. So much. I don't want to deal with them anymore. I am a genuinely good person. The reason why I tell you this is because I do not want you to think that I deserve it. I didn't deserve to be treated the way I was. The way they have treated me has caused me to become vindictive and vengeful towards people that hurt me. What they did to me has turned me into what I am.

I do have plenty of guy friends but they only like me because they want to get in my pants. More than one person has told me this. The reason why I believe them is because most of then admitted to the fact that if broke up with my boyfriend they would be first in line to ask me out. Secondly, 60% of then told me that they want to have sex with me. It is a sad fact, I learned to except over time. As for girls, I just have bad luck with them.


Reason 2: My drawings
My drawings can be a bit disturbing. On one page I would draw a peaceful beautiful garden with plenty of rabbits and the next page I would draw pictures of mutilated bodies of my enemies.
My drawings are like Esther's from the movie Orphan. The only difference is I can't draw well.


I forgot the rest of the reasons. I know there are more. Maybe it is because I have more than one personality running around in my head... maybe it is because I say really strange stuff... maybe it is becuase I don't like sex.

I do admit... I am a bit off and what every mental instability I have is getting worse. I just don't feel like going to a psychologist.